Monday, November 16, 2009

For Better or For Worse

As Mike and I approach our 3 year anniversary and I look at all we've been through, I'm so thankful that when we said "For better or for worse" we meant it. Trust me, we've been through worse. We've trucked through. Sure, maybe it's hasn't been the worse that could be but it was by no means easy. And yes, three years isn't that long and I'm sure we'll face even more struggles. All I can say is that I'm glad I serve a God who loves. A God who forgives. A God who doesn't give up when things get hard. My husband loves me and it's by God's grace that he puts up with me and all the "crap" that comes with me. And the same goes the other way around. We take our marriage day by day. Most days are easy but then there are those rocky days where we have to work. Those are the days that count. The days that make us learn. I'm glad that I'll be able to look back at those days and be glad that we pushed through and didn't give up. It's those days that make us stronger. I love Mike more and more. It's hard to believe that this love can get any stronger but then it does.

However, I'm also forced to think about a number of our peers who have given up on their marriages. At least 4 of our couple friends are no longer together. I have to ask myself, when and why did the words "For Better of For Worse" lose their meaning to so many people. I'm appalled at the lack of sincerity that these words hold for so many of my peers. I'm broken hearted and grieved more than ever. All of these couples have a child. All are Christians. All made the same vow. All have given into the lies of the devil! All have given into the world's view that divorce is an acceptable outlet when things get hard. When did the phrase "When the going gets tough the tough get going" turn into "When the going gets tough....See ya!"?

I know the reasons behind 3 out of 4 of the divorces of our friends. I know that in at least 2 of the 4 it was the woman who gave in. Do we not understand that life is hard? That men have struggles? That they need God's grace as much as ours? That they need our support? That they are human!? When they made their vows they thought that they had a partner that would stick with them through thick and thin. That wouldn't give up on them. How wrong they were! I'm almost ashamed of my gender in this respect. Why is it that we have given into the world's view of having to be perfect, beautiful, flawless? When our husbands don't feed into that idea the way we need him to, we get so offended. God tells us to not be offended! Our beauty, our worth lies in Him. Not in our husbands! They are only human and prone to sin just as we are! Why do we take that personally? We can't blame them totally. (I'm not saying it doesn't hurt) We need to realize and rebuke the Liar behind it all! Don't let the Devil steal your joy! Show him who's in charge! Stick by your husband through all the Devil presents him until he can no longer break through! For Better or For there for your husband in every sense of the way. Emotionally, Spiritually, and Physically!

Please don't think I'm judging these couples or making their struggles seem simple. That's not my point at all. I'm simply analyzing what's going on in this world and the sacredness of marriage. I'm just using these events as examples because it's what I have to go off of. I'm sick of the Devil discouraging people. I'm sick of the "fate" he's laid on young couples. I'm sick of seeing young divorcees with children, and what their children are going through. I've always believed that when you set your mind on something (something that God approves of), that something will come to fruition. So if you have in your mind "I can handle anything that comes our way in this marriage", you will work that much harder to see that that's exactly what happens. If you think that everything is going to come at you easy as're setting yourself up for failure. The devil comes to steal, kill and destroy and you are no exception! But be prayfully prepared, mindfully prepared (Both of you!) and you will push through. You will see better days. You will be triumphant. And you will stand by the vows that you took before God, before loved ones. For Better of For Worse.

Did you mean it?

(I'm sorry if I rambled and vented a little too much but I just needed to get this off my chest. I know the devil is a liar. I rebuke this "trend" from my life, and the life of my friends. My prayer is that the devil will not continue to take joy from young married couples-that one day "For Better or For Worse" will actually mean something when "For Worse" actually comes around.)

1 comment:

Marie Steves said...

Our 5 year anniversary is on Thursday and I have been doing some similar reflecting since so many people arround us are going through divorce. My heart grieves for them and their children. Love is not always easy it is a choice you have to make, sometimes daily.